The Aftermath...A Story

Looking back it's difficult for me to imagine. It seems like a lifetime ago that I was leading a normal life. To say I was the victim of a violent crime is an understatement of grand proportions. I don't even remember much of it.

It turned out I was kidnapped by a demented medical school drop out. He had emotional issue his whole life but had never acted out like this. Apparently, he snapped and decided to play God with me. During those four weeks he had me sedated, he amputated all four of my limbs and sewed me back up.

According to my doctors, he know what he was doing. All of my residual limbs healed perfectly without any infections or problems. In fact, one doctor commented that it looked like the work of a seasoned professional. Lucky me, huh. I was told that a neighbor of my abductor heard me scream at one point and contacted the police. When the cops showed up at his door he apparently freaked out realizing he was about to be caught. He fired on the cops who then returned fire and killed him.
That lunatic left me with no arms other than 1 short stump protruding from my right shoulder. My left shoulder is rounded smooth with no stump at all. I have no legs what so ever...just a rounded bottom where my legs used to be.

So, now I'm limbless...helpless. Accepting what happened to me was extremely difficult. I often think that it would be easier to accept having had an accident or some horrible disease. But, a senseless violent crime like this? My only solace comes from the fact that he's dead. Eventually, I came to terms with it and started a new chapter of my life. Pretty much everything changed for me. I was no longer a vivacious 23 year old woman but a severely handicapped person needing 24/7 care. I couldn't do anything for myself at all.

The rehab center outfitted me with a wheelchair I could control with my right stump. For some reason, he left me that. As crazy as it sounds, that makes all the difference in the world. There was enough of a residual limb for them to outfit me with a prosthetic arm. With it on, I am able to do a few things for my self but not much. Basically, I'm able to scratch my nose press buttons, flip switches and feed myself. I also discovered another thing recently...I can pleasure myself.

As crazy as it sounds, I can actually masturbate again. The ability to pleasure yourself is truly a very private and inherently human thing. To be deprived of that is torture. I was not obsessed with masturbation by any stretch when I had my hands. However, knowing that I was unable to do it made me obsess. I was consumed with the fact that I would probably never find a sex partner and to make it worse I would never be able to masturbate.

Before I learned how to use my hook, I tried everything. I tried scooting around on the floor pressing my vagina against the floor hoping to stimulate my clit. I tried pressing my vagina against a bed post and wiggling around. I ended up falling off the bed! And, it's not the kind of thing you ask a friend to do although I came close. It's damn frustrating.

It was actually by accident that I learned this new skill. My therapist had been teaching me ways to manipulate my hook. Basically there were two positions for the hooks. Fully extended so that is was primarily straight out. The other way involved pressing my chin against a lever on my shoulder harness that release the hook so that it pointed more inward. In general this helped with feeding myself. So, I was home practicing retracting the hook and then repositioning it by pressing it against a hard surface to snap it back into position. At one point, I was positioning my chair and accidentally caught my hook against a table which turned the lower part very far inward towards my body. With the hook in the bent position is was right against my vagina. It took me about 3 seconds to realize I might actually be able to do something here. I was wearing these little shorts like I always did and they were easy to wiggle out of. With no legs whatsoever, I just had to slide around a bit and off they came. With my shorts and panties off, I turned my pelvis as far up as I could without sliding out of my chair. Then I lifted my arm on top of me and began to maneuver my shoulder so I could get the tips of my hook close to my clit. After a few attempts, I was there! Eureka! With the tips in my vagina I just pulled up a bit on my shoulder and bent the elbow a smidgen and before I knew it the tips were inside me pressing right on my g spot. The "thumb" of my hook was pressing on my clit and basically I was going to town.

As I maneuvered my shoulder and my arm stump, the hook was moving in just the right motion. It took a lot of concentration but before long I was building up towards an orgasm. Aside from a few dreams, I had not experienced an orgasm since before I lost my limbs. To help keep pressure against my clit and gspot I tried to move my pelvis. The combination of hook, shoulder, pelvis motion drove me to an explosion of an orgasm.

I was utterly elated.